More Dress-Up

I thought I was successful in creating Halloween costumes that the boys could enjoy all month long (and then some) this year when we put together our Indiana Jones costumes. Todd showed me another Halloween costume that has gotten its share of playtime.

This was my first attempt at sewing a Halloween costume (it's an alligator, in case you were wondering), and one of the few projects I had attempted to sew independent of any outside help. Todd wore it when he was three years old, and because I had made the hood so big, he can still wear it. Todd put it on (out of the blue) the night before last and wore it all night long (including sleeping in it).

This little boy just makes me laugh sometimes. Last night Ryan put on pajama shorts for bedtime. Then, he decided that shorts were too cold and he changed into warmer PJ's--the first time these have been worn this season. Rather than putting his shorts away in the dresser like I had asked, he decided that they would make the perfect "sleeping hat". He was so excited when he woke up this morning and found that his "sleeping hat" was still on!

Another thing that Ryan did that made me smile last night was the way he said his prayer. Ryan has a lot of "conversations" in his prayer. He likes to tell Heavenly Father about what he did, what he wants, what he thinks is funny, stuff like that. Last night he said something like, "...and I love Mom because...'cause...Hm. Hm. Hm...'cause she puts me to bed and leaves the door open like that" (surely pointing to the door at the same time--I had my eyes closed).

The Pumpkin Patch

Best thing to do with your little "blessings" in a small town in the month of October? Take them to a pumpkin patch! Ours is put on by a local church, and it is a big hit with our family every year.

Our visit to the pumpkin patch included:

1. Trying to re-attach "magic leaves" to an oak tree.

2. A self-portrait. (I obviously need more practice. Consider yourself warned.)

3. Heavy lifting.

4. Being forced to pose in the cardboard cut-out photo op.

4. Jumping and, even better, falling in the bounce house.

5. Running in the empty petting zoo area (the animals had a previous engagement).

6. Looking at, petting, attempting to feed, and holding the animals. (We had to come back this weekend to see the animals. The boys did not want to miss it.)

7. Exploring the fire truck. Thanks to the firemen who took their time to explain the gear to the boys!

8. Trying to re-attach a broken stem to a pumpkin. (It didn't work.)

9. A photo with Mom. (At least one of us is happy to be in the picture.)

10. Nice smiles for Mommy? Yeah!! Thanks for a great day at the Pumpkin Patch. Let's do it again next year.

Being Indiana--The Hat

Perhaps you have been able to tell that the favorite superhero around our house lately is Dr. Indiana Jones. Both boys are dressing up as Dr. Jones for Halloween. They decided on that early this month. I have already made their whips and bag, bought their brown pants, found one hat that will work (from Daddy), and on Wednesday our neighbor let us borrow their hat.

Ryan wore this hat all day yesterday, and he's not even that much of a "hat person". He had on his brown pants and a white shirt and often had the bag and/or whip with him. It was so cute. Above, he plays with his Indiana Jones Legos. Ryan brought me the DVD case for one of the Indiana Jones movies and asked me to read it. "Look, this is "R". What does this say?" I would tell him "Raiders . . . of the Lost Ark." He kept asking me to read the word "Raiders" throughout the day. Mildly obsessed?

This morning Ryan told me that he wanted to wear his Indiana Jones pants again. I told him that they were in the laundry, since he wore them all day yesterday. He said he really wanted to wear them, because they make him look cool. I may try to do a quick load of laundry so he can wear them again (and look cool).

This is the most use I have gotten from a Halloween costume ever! I love it.

Hammock-Worthy Weather

This post is hard for me to write. These photos were taken earlier this week when it was sunny, dry, and the perfect temperature for keeping your doors and windows open: cool mornings, warming up to shorts-and-T-shirt afternoons.

Today it has been wet and rainy all day. Even now as I type I still hear the wind and the rain. I don't think it's let up much since since 1:00pm. It is hard to believe that yesterday was absolutely gorgeous.

I had been setting up our big hammock outside quite often. (We don't keep it up all the time because the rope mildews and rots too quickly when left out.) Ryan has enjoyed a few "rest times" on the hammock when Todd has been at school.
I have enjoyed some nice quiet time out there with Ryan as well. Ryan especially enjoys being read to on the hammock. He frequently brings a pillow to the hammock with him. One word: heavenly.

Logan joined us on the hammock on Sunday afternoon. Gary had stopped by for a minute on his way to Donna's house and was kind enough to swing all four of us (Todd, Ryan, Logan, and myself) for a few minutes. What fun! Then the boys took turns swinging each other. It was such a pleasant afternoon, and it was so nice to see them all enjoying each other and the beautiful weather.

Ryan even got Daddy to lay down for a few minutes and read "Harry the Dirty Dog," his favorite book this week.

Here's hoping for more hammock-worthy weather, and time to enjoy it after the rain leaves!

Dr. Jones Won't Be Moving Here Anytime Soon

I haven't any seen snakes in our yard for what seems like a few years. So, imagine my surprise when we found another snake (this one outside in the back yard) the same day I posted about the king snake--three snakes in one month!

This one was just a garter snake. He was stinky and speedy, so Brett picked it up just long enough for all of us to see it, then released it in the gardenia bushes. I wish that I could see the display on my camera (still broken...) well enough to focus the photo better. Oh well, you get the idea.We've had fun checking out these snakes lately. As long as they are not poisonous I'm fine. I do hope we don't come across any meanies in our neighborhood. I worry most about identifying the pygmy rattlesnakes. Anne and I were discussing how there are so many different color variations and how different a snakes looks when it is resting compared with its ready-to-strike pose.

What a Whopper!

I came across an article in my Parenting magazine called, "What a Whopper!" I was curious what it might say, since I have a preschooler who often says things he knows are untrue. I found the following statement interesting:

"Lillian was lying frequently, for kicks, and she'd never admit that a made-up story wasn't true. Should I insist on honesty, I wondered, lest she develop into a pathological liar? Or let it slide, to avoid crushing her creativity?
"The latter, apparently: The experts I quizzed about Lillian's tale were unfazed. 'There nothing wrong with her telling it.' says Michael Brody, M.D., a child psychiatrist in Potomac, Maryland. 'Very young kids don't know the difference between truth and fiction.'
"In fact, this type of lying can be a sign of good things. 'Preschoolers with higher IQ scores are more likely to lie,' says Angela Crossman, Ph.D., associate professor of psychology at John Jay College of Criminal Justice in New York, who researched the subject. Early lying proficiency may also be linked with good social skills in adolescence."

In general, I found the article somewhat disturbing. At no point did they really emphasize the role parents have in teaching their children honesty. I got the feeling they were saying, "Don't worry so much if your toddler lies. He'll grow out of it just like everyone else." The problem is that many don't grow out of it. There are plenty of adults who lie, stretch the truth, or are dishonest in other ways. I don't want my children to be dishonest as they mature. In order for them to avoid that, I feel they need to be taught while they are young.

Now, I understand that there is a difference between telling a story for fun that he knows is not true and telling me a lie when I ask a direct question. For example, when we were driving down Highway 20, we passed a father and son who were walking together on the sidewalk. A minute later Ryan says, "I saw a little boy walking down the street with no daddy." I knew that wasn't true, but I was able to play along with it saying, "Really?!? That sounds dangerous" or something along those lines. Another minute later Ryan fessed up, "Not really. He was walking with a daddy, but no mommy." I understand that this kind of thinking is stretching his imagination, helping him understand the world around him, figuring out the difference between fact and faction, whatever.

But when I ask him in the morning, "Ryan, did you keep your diaper dry last night?" I expect him to be able to answer me truthfully. Sometimes he swears he kept it dry, but when I look at the diaper sitting at the top of the trash I can see (and smell) that he was nowhere near staying dry. The problem is that he knows keeping a dry diaper reaps the reward of a small piece of candy. So he answers what is most convenient, regardless of whether it is true.

I don't punish Ryan for lying in those situations, because I know that he is still quite young and is still learning what truth is. However, I do call him on it. I will point out that he did not tell me the truth, and that when I ask him a question he needs to tell me the right answer.

I guess my point is, yes, preschoolers are still very young and do not always understand the difference between truth and fiction. However, if you let it slide too often and too long, you may find yourself with a popular adolescent who has all the friends in the world, but who lies constantly to her parents and gets into a heap of trouble.

Dr. Jones Might Be Afraid of This

About a week after Brett brought home the (very cool) red rat snake from work, this is what I found one night in our dining room. I hope this doesn't scare anyone away from visiting us. Mom, you're still coming for Thanksgiving, right? We have been leaving our doors open more frequently because of the pleasant weather, and I think this guy just crawled right through the front door.

As I have gone back and read the NieNie Dialogues blog and read of NieNie's experiences when she first moved to Arizona, I was wondering how much I would be freaking out if I found a scorpion in my child's bed--I'd really be freaked out! I thought to myself, "Well, at least in Florida the cockroaches won't hurt you. They're just disgusting." I have to admit though, snakes in the dining room could cause one to freak out a bit.

Perhaps our snake experience the week before prepared me to handle this experience better. After all, this was only a baby. Just a worm. I did keep my distance long enough to go through the riddle: Red on yellow, Kills a fellow, Red on black, Friend of Jack. Then I ran to get Brett to show him my discovery (and confirm that this was only a king snake and not a poisonous coral snake). Brett and I took turns holding him (cool, but not nearly as cool as the rat snake), then made a little terrarium for it until we could show it to Todd and Ryan. [Gary, aren't you glad that you didn't happen to stop by when the terrarium (and snake) were sitting on top of our fridge?]

This time the boys guessed right away what might be in the box.

It took Ryan no time at all to reach out and touch the snake, ready to hold it.

Though Todd let Ryan go first, he was not shy about holding this snake.

We have made sure to tell the boys that they are not allowed to touch a snake they find on their own. They have to get Mom and Dad (Dad, preferably) as soon as they see a snake. Some snakes have poison and we will only let them them touch the ones that won't hurt them. They seem to understand this (I certainly hope so!). I am glad that under supervised conditions they are able to enjoy examining reptiles without fear.

Another Good Fairy Tale

I haven't been able to do this much reading since Todd was a little baby and I spent all my time on the couch nursing him. Before that it had been since I was working as a receptionist for Delta Medical, a small business where I finished my work quickly, we had few telephone calls and even fewer walk-in customers.

8:30pm Wednesday night found me found me on the couch "finishing a chapter" in a book I had just started the day before called Princess Academy, by Shannon Hale. I had planned on getting some work done like folding laundry, finishing Halloween costumes, or getting caught up on paperwork. However, once I was sitting comfortably reading the book I couldn't stop (until 12:30am when I finished it!). Besides, laundry can wait 'til tomorrow (or the next day). Now that I am able to get a little more done during the day I don't always feel the same pressure to do so much multi-tasking at night.

I had enjoyed The Goose Girl by Shannon Hale so much that I checked out Princess Academy from the library. It was another sweet fairy tale. The Goose Girl was based on a Grimm's fairy tale which I had never heard of. When I was in the library with Ryan yesterday (story time every Thursday) we were sitting on the floor between two bookshelves looking at books so Ryan could pick some out. My eyes fell on The Goose Girl, an easy version of the Grimm's fairy tale. I'm not sure how closely it followed the original, but I'm sure it was closer than the young adult novel I enjoyed so much. It was nice to read another version of the story, but I found that I enjoyed the detail and the story of the Shannon Hale novel much better.

[In case you haven't figured it out already, I could read or watch about 100 versions of the Cinderella story before I got tired of it. I'm a sucker for happily-ever-after fairy tales.]

Identity

The topic for this post has been on my mind for a few weeks. It came up at my MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers) meeting last month. We were talking about identity, specifically about how so many mothers struggle with discovering who they are after they have children or remembering who they were before. This comes up quite a bit in groups like these. We (mothers with young children) are reminded to take care of ourselves, figure out what we enjoy doing, take time to do those things, talk with other moms, etc. Our speaker at that meeting was talking about the different roles we have: mothers, wives, sisters, daughters, employees, caregivers, teachers. She also emphasized the role we have of "woman" without the attachment of these other roles. Can we define who we are without including the relationships we have with other people?

I always tend to zone out when conversations lean this way. Not because I don't think they offer some valuable advice. I just don't relate very well. We talked about the speaker in our small group discussion. A few of the women talked about their struggle with figuring out who they were as mothers. I wanted to know if there was anyone who didn't have this same struggle. Am I weird because I didn't lose sight of my self? I shared my perspective--how using my talents and interests with my children, especially with music and reading, helped me maintain them. I was hoping for some reassurance that there were others like me, but I was left with some blank stares.

Since then I have done some introspection. Did I struggle with my identify at some point, and have I forgotten about it already? If not, what made the difference? Am I too simple-minded or boring? Or do I have some strength of knowledge that has helped me know who I am? I like to think it is the latter.

I think it boils down to faith and knowledge of the gospel. From the time that I was little I was reminded of my true identity--that of a daughter of God. Because I am truly his daughter, he created my spirit, and I have inherited divine qualities. This sounds trite, but I know it's true. Each one of us has been blessed with certain gifts and talents. Growing up in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, I was encouraged to figure out what my gifts were early and to work on developing them. Of course, there are some gifts that we won't discover we have until we are put in certain situations. We discover our weaknesses along the way as well, but we recognize the resources we have to overcome those weaknesses.

Working on programs in the church like Personal Progress gave me opportunities to try new things, to develop my faith, and discover my gifts. I have also learned more about myself and increased my faith as I have served in the church. I have enjoyed developing friendships, learning more about the gospel, and seeing how my talents and gifts can bless others. All of these things have worked together to make my life full.

I have a purpose, a long-term goal of improving myself and returning to my Father in Heaven. I have not lost sight of that most-important goal in the different phases of my life: living at home with my parents, college student, young (poor) married woman, full-time working (not-so-poor) married woman, mother of infants, and my current role as a mother of a preschooler and kindergartener.

It helps that I saw the value of motherhood early on. I have wanted to be a mother from the time that I was a young girl. I knew that it was important to have a good education, and being a college-graduate was was one of my goals as well. But ultimately, I wanted to be able to use my education to help care for my future family. Becoming a mother was always part of the plan, and maybe that was another reason it wasn't so difficult knowing that I could still be "me" and a mom at the same time. I think I would've struggled more if I had not married or had children. Even then, I hope I would have had the faith to recognize that God still had a plan and a purpose for me, regardless of what my plan was.

My biggest struggle has been finding time to work on all of those things that I would like. When my babies were babies it was hard to find time to sing in a chorus. I have been singing in a community chorus for a few years now, but I still find it a challenge to sit down and really practice the piano. However, even with young children I was able to both sing and play on occasion at church.

I keep a running list of things that I would like to do (see, Lisa, I don't think you're so weird in that respect): books I would like to read, recipes I would like to make, projects I would like to sew or cross-stitch or needlepoint, crafts I would like to make, photos I would like to organize and scrapbook, flowers and plants I would like to grow, far-away and nearby places I would like to visit, languages I would like to learn (German and Spanish), songs I would like to play or sing.

Does the fact that I don't have time for all these things right now change who I am or what my interests are? No.

Ultimately, as I focus on my faith, my identity is confirmed. I am a daughter of God. That will never change. The more I focus on strengthening that relationship by praying, studying, and righteous living, the happier I am and the greater is my vision of that which is most important.

Tag, You're It

Okay, so I am new to this whole tagging game. I get it, but I'm not sure of the protocol in posting my tag and passing it on. I was given liberty to pass it on to as many people as I wanted. To make it easy on myself I am only tagging one person: the only one who reads my blog besides the one who tagged me. Yup, Lisa, I mean YOU!

So Lisa, I expect to see the sixth picture in your photo folder posted on your blog soon. Then pass it on as you choose.

Here is my sixth photo. How fun it is to look back at old photos. This is my sweet Ryan, four months old on January 5, 2005. What a kissable thing he was! And is!

A Note To Todd

I am so proud of Todd for the progress that he has made with his reading. I am amazed at how quickly his reading has improved. The first book that he "read" required a bit of help from me. Now, he can successful read books at his level without much assistance.

This weekend provided me with an opportunity to write a real note to Todd that he would be able to read independently. As I look at it now, it seems awfully harsh for my first handwritten note to my child. The circumstances were this: Brett had been working long days this past week and took the day off on Friday to go fishing. Because he had been working late on Thursday, he was not able to go bed early before the fishing trip. He came home on Friday night after the boys were in bed . . . exhausted.

He made a teasing comment along the lines of, "I have a feeling I'll be yelling at the boys in the morning." Meaning, he knew that the boys would wake up early in the morning and want to come into Mom and Dad's room to talk to us, to play, to tell Dad who was the "early-bird", or for some other reason and Brett would still want to be sleeping. I knew that I also wanted to sleep in longer than the boys, so the idea came to me to write a note. I was trying to write the sentences easy enough for Todd to read. I was so excited about the thought of him reading and understanding the note that I kept on going with my "Do not's".

I taped it to the bedroom door at just the right height and went to bed. The note ended up being unnecessary for Brett. He wasn't able to sleep in past 7:00am. Too many 5:00am mornings for him. 7:00 is sleeping in! Todd still read it, and I think that Brett encouraged him to follow the advice on the note for Mom's benefit (who was trying hard to sleep in until 8:00am, but who gave up and got out of bed at 7:45am--an hour past my usual wake-up time).

I passed Todd in the hallway on my way to the kitchen and he informed me that he only opened the door to put his pajamas into the hamper (legitimate reason). I asked him if he had read and understood the note. He replied that he had and then read the whole thing to me. I was so proud of him.

He was so proud of himself that he peeled the note off of our bedroom door and taped it to his own.

Some Things That Make Me Smile

a "NIE"-inspired post:

1.

Rather than coming to Mom when he first got out of bed, Ryan went straight into my closet and climbed into the dirty clothes basket.

2.

I'm so happy when the dogs get attention during the day from the boys, because they certainly don't get much from me.

3.

Brett had put the boys to bed while I attended a music practice. This is how I found Todd when I came home and checked on him.

I love taking photos of my sleeping beauties - such innocence and peace.

4.

Dear Todd and Ryan,

I love you. I love your sweetness which is displayed in so many unexpected moments during the day.

Dear Stephanie, a.k.a. NieNie,

Thank you for sharing your creativite talents and faith with the blogging world. And for showing us how you take care of your family in such loving and beautiful ways. You inspire us. We are looking forward to hearing your blog-voice again soon.

Dear Courtney, a.k.a. CJane,

Thank you for sharing your thoughtful and heartfelt words with us. Your love for your extended family inspires us. Your posts make me cry more often than I care to admit.

Love, Becca

Faux Pas

This morning I was dressed in some light sweats and a moderately form-fitting (at least around the mid-section) shirt--comfort clothes. While I was getting breakfast ready for the boys Ryan said something to the effect of, "Mom, you look like you have a baby in your tummy." . . . thanks.

So, to my girlfriends who keep telling me that I look fine, sometimes even "good"--I know better. Four-year-olds don't lie about these things. And, I have known the truth of his statement for quite a while.

The funny thing is that even though my tummy bothers me, I am okay with me. In fact, I am so okay with me that I still went for that chocolate cookie an hour later!

Now I need to make sure that I teach Ryan how big of a faux pas he committed. I was not (that) offended, but I would have been mortified if he had tried this statement out on someone else first.

Even Dr. Jones Isn't Afraid of This

Last Tuesday Brett brought home a surprise for the family. What do you think it is??

That's right, a snake! Brett found it when he was at a job site in Pensacola. I love the expression on Todd's face in that middle picture above--the happy excitement. The boys thought it was great. They both touched it and tried to pet it right away.

The boys quickly decided that even Indiana Jones (who hates snakes, of course) wouldn't be afraid of this snake. We had a hard time deciding on a name for the snake. Brett and I were in favor of Dr. Jinks. I just wanted to keep the "Dr." prefix in honor of Indiana. Ryan decided to name the snake Mr. Teddy-Bone (a name he claims he heard from Mickey Mouse on the Playhouse Disney web site).

Todd stuck with the "one-finger-touch" for a while, but it didn't take Ryan too long before he was ready to see if it would climb onto his shoulder. He said it tickled him.

You can tell how much I trust my husband's knowledge of things natural. Brett says that this snake is one of the most gentle snakes you'll find in the wild. And I believe him--no questions asked--enough that I am willing to try hold the snake and let it climb over my arms. Looking at these pictures I think it looks a little crazy. However, I would do it again in a heartbeat. It really was cool. It was neat feeling the snake's body contract and relax as it moved. I also liked feeling it tighten its tail around my finger or wrist as it tried climbing off one limb and moving to another. Awesome.

Todd wouldn't hold the snake in the afternoon with the rest of us. But as soon as Brett said that it was time to let it go that evening, Todd wanted a turn. He didn't want to miss this opportunity. By then he had seen the rest of us handle the snake without any fear or any problems and with great enthusiasm. Todd did great.

We even printed out some pictures for Todd to bring to school for Show-And-Tell. Here are some of the facts that I wrote out for Todd to share with his class:

-corn snake; "red rat snake"
-a constrictor

-a good climber, but prefers to hide underground

-eats mice, young rats, small birds, lizards, and frogs

We let him loose under the little wooden deck off our bedroom, but I agree with Brett that we probably won't ever see him again. It's a shame. He would be a pretty cool pet. I think Brett's dad will be relieved to hear that we decided not to keep him in a tank in the house (he shares a phobia with Dr. Jones)--don't doubt that we were a little tempted.

Hope to see you again, Dr. Teddy-Bone.