You may be aware that Brett has been working toward a Big Adventure for himself--working, planning, preparing for over a year to do something that will fulfill a life dream of his. I am proud of him for making his dreams come true. He is an inspiration. He demonstrates that dreams don't happen by chance. You have to work to make them come true.
I am excited for him. I look forward to hearing how this Big Adventure changes him. I am looking forward to reading his journal even more than I am looking forward to seeing his photos of the gorgeous scenery.
But I also feel a little envious of his Big Adventure.
Not that I resent him in any way.
And I feel a little left out or left behind from his Big Adventure.
Not that I feel that he is in any way abandoning me or our family.
I just want to have my own Big Adventure.
Not that I have any desire to do the Big Adventure that he is doing....at all.
But I do want to have a Big Adventure that changes me, affects me deeply, creates memories and feelings that are life-lasting.
I will be having my own little adventure this year while Brett is having his Big Adventure. The question is, how can I use my adventure experiences to their greatest advantage? It is my responsibility to make the best use of my time. To be in the moment. To plan activities with my boys that will be meaningful. They may not be life-changing. But we can still create memories and feelings that are life-lasting.
Brett and I had a great conversation this weekend. A real conversation. So many conversations are superficial that those real conversations, by comparison, hit you--Right.There.In the chest.
We talked about adventures, dreams and life-changing experiences. He reminded me that while I may never have a huge chunk of time devoted to a Big Life-Changing Adventure, I have a number of smaller adventures that are important to me.
Brett jokes that I would be gone every other weekend traveling if I could. It's so true, it's not really a joke. But responsibilities at home, church, and school, as well as not having a significant amount of cash, prevent me from traveling much more than once a year. The point is to not let those responsibilities and the busyness of daily life get in the way of me enjoying my life and my little adventures or prevent me from planning my bigger adventures.
Brett shared this quote that he liked with me:
“Everyone knows that tearing feeling between necessity’s pull and your heart’s pull. That balance between needing to pay the bills and having a dream. It is a difficult road. All I [know is] that I [am] determined somehow to follow my heart...”
-Bear Grylls, The Kid Who Climbed Everest
Then I shared this quote with him:
"So many people live within unhappy circumstances and yet will not take the initiative to change their situation because they are conditioned to a life of security, conformity, and conservatism, all of which may appear to give one peace of mind, but in reality nothing is more dangerous to the adventurous spirit within a man than a secure future. The very basic core of a man's living spirit is his passion for adventure. The joy of life comes from our encounters with new experiences, and hence there is no greater joy than to have an endlessly changing horizon, for each day to have a new and different sun." — Chris McCandless
I don't exactly agree with the above quote (by Chris McCandless) for myself, but I get what it is trying to say. I, however, find myself in happy circumstances that include a life of security. It is having that security, both financial and familial, that allows me the freedom to plan new experiences--perhaps not as many as I would wish, but certainly more than I would have otherwise. I may not be a great explorer or an individual with a "passion" for adventure, but I do have my own little set of dreams and hopes and desires for new experiences. And I feel blessed to have a husband who loves me and encourages me to pursue those things that matter to me.
Brett and I concluded our conversation with the idea that while some dreams may come about spontaneously--for us, our dreams are most likely to happen with careful planning. Say it. Write it. See it. Plan it. Do it.
Here are some adventures we hope for:
2013- A family ski trip
(and perhaps another trip to Germany for Becca)
2014- Grand Canyon!!
2016- Taking the boys to Germany
Later that evening I asked Todd (who was not a part of the above conversation at all), "Todd, you know how Dad is having a great adventure this year....What adventure would you want to do for yourself?" His reply, "The Grand Canyon. ...and white water river rafting." I look forward to sharing our family plans with him and giving him the chance to see his dream become a reality.
I am happy that my boys have a father who can show them, teaching them by example, the way to make their dreams come true. I hope that they will be able to do the same for themselves one day.
