Time With Todd

On Wednesday I skimmed an article that talked about some things we can do to help our families be functional (as opposed to dysfunctional). It mentioned being intentional about the way we express ourselves towards our children. I thought about how I could do a better job of spending quality time with my boys. I spend time with them; I talk to them; I sing a song to them and tuck them in bed at night; I read scriptures with them in the morning; I attend class parties and special functions; I try to make them good meals, including the occasional just-for-fun foods (like the star-shaped chicken hand pies we had for dinner last week) and encourage family mealtimes. But so often I feel like many of my activities with them are rushed.

It made me feel good when I thought about the past few days; I recognized two times that I slowed down for Todd. Ryan is an easy one to snuggle with and feel close to. Even today when I was in Ryan's classroom to watch his presentation he was sitting in my lap. (There weren't enough chairs to go around and that was an easy and mutually agreeable solution.) Todd really enjoys one-on-one time, but he doesn't always get it. I had been feeling like we have been really busy, and I wanted to play some games with the boys on Sunday. We played a game of Scattegories Junior with Jen. After she left I let Todd pick a game. Todd picked the game Life. I ever-so-slightly rolled my eyes, but agreed. I'm so glad that I did. We ended up having a really nice game together. I know that it means a lot to Todd when someone takes time to play with him, whether it is a board game or a backyard game of football or tether ball (like Papa played with him on Tuesday afternoon).

I had another opportunity to spend time with Todd Tuesday evening. On Wednesday there was a special dinner for the Cub Scouts called the Blue and Gold Banquet. All the boys were invited to make and decorate a cake. I felt like Todd should do as much as possible on his own. Knowing that he has little experience in the kitchen (because I don't have the patience to cook often with my children) I knew it would take a while. I wanted it to be good experience so I added some songs to a new playlist I called "Cooking With Todd," and I let Todd add some songs as well. Having the music helped me relax and have more fun with the activity. Todd impressed me with how well he knew his way around the kitchen finding all of the ingredients and the measure spoons and cups. He did a great job and we both had fun with it.

On Wednesday we decorated the cake. We were running a little late after school trying to get everything done, so I did feel a little rushed. But, Todd still decorated the cake using his own design and was really proud of the final product. I need to let the boys cook with me in the kitchen more.

Whenever I do something right with my boys I think, "I'm so glad that I am helping to create such a positive memory for them." It would behoove me to ask myself, "What kind of memory am I creating for them?" during those times that I allow things to get too rushed and show impatience with them. I want them to have and to remember a mom who took time with them.