Bulbous Bouffant . . . Macadamia

I got to see my twin sister Lisa in Utah this past November. Okay, so she's not really my twin. In fact, she's nine years younger than I am. In other words, she's like fifteen--or something close to that. But whenever we get together with the family we are undoubtedly called by the other's name. All.The.Time. Especially by Mom. So, we decided to have a little fun with it. Lisa straightens her thicker-than-mine hair every day. Every Day. This was the second time in my life I had straightened my hair. I am just too apathetic--and lazy, I've concluded.

What do you think? Can you see the sisterly resemblance?

Lisa straightened my hair the night before I flew back home. That day I enjoyed the silky smooth feeling of my new hair and looked forward to seeing what Brett thought about it.

As you may know, Winter has passed us by this year. We have been enjoying the season called "Humid" for months now, with very brief reprieves. The night that Brett picked me up from the airport in the convertible was no exception. By the time we got home, there was only a hint of the formerly silky smooth hair. By morning, all traces of it were gone. Ah, Florida.

I got three inches of my hair cut off this week, and we haven't had a dry day since. Which means that somehow I am sporting what I can only describe as a modified bouffant.

It's not exactly a bulbous bouffant, but when considering my hair this morning I couldn't help but think of this "song". The first year that Brett and I were married we lived in Tallahassee and drove "home" once or twice a month. Sometimes on the drive we were rewarded with a little Dr. Demento time on the radio. That is when I discovered this gem. Just saying the word "bouffant" brings back memories.

Be forewarned. It's catchy.

(And, just for fun, here's another one of Brett's favorites.)
(Why stop there? Brett, this one's for you.)

Big Adventures

You may be aware that Brett has been working toward a Big Adventure for himself--working, planning, preparing for over a year to do something that will fulfill a life dream of his. I am proud of him for making his dreams come true. He is an inspiration. He demonstrates that dreams don't happen by chance. You have to work to make them come true.

I am excited for him. I look forward to hearing how this Big Adventure changes him. I am looking forward to reading his journal even more than I am looking forward to seeing his photos of the gorgeous scenery.

But I also feel a little envious of his Big Adventure.
Not that I resent him in any way.

And I feel a little left out or left behind from his Big Adventure.
Not that I feel that he is in any way abandoning me or our family.

I just want to have my own Big Adventure.
Not that I have any desire to do the Big Adventure that he is doing....at all.

But I do want to have a Big Adventure that changes me, affects me deeply, creates memories and feelings that are life-lasting.

I will be having my own little adventure this year while Brett is having his Big Adventure. The question is, how can I use my adventure experiences to their greatest advantage? It is my responsibility to make the best use of my time. To be in the moment. To plan activities with my boys that will be meaningful. They may not be life-changing. But we can still create memories and feelings that are life-lasting.

Brett and I had a great conversation this weekend. A real conversation. So many conversations are superficial that those real conversations, by comparison, hit you--Right.There.In the chest.

We talked about adventures, dreams and life-changing experiences. He reminded me that while I may never have a huge chunk of time devoted to a Big Life-Changing Adventure, I have a number of smaller adventures that are important to me.

Brett jokes that I would be gone every other weekend traveling if I could. It's so true, it's not really a joke. But responsibilities at home, church, and school, as well as not having a significant amount of cash, prevent me from traveling much more than once a year. The point is to not let those responsibilities and the busyness of daily life get in the way of me enjoying my life and my little adventures or prevent me from planning my bigger adventures.

Brett shared this quote that he liked with me:
“Everyone knows that tearing feeling between necessity’s pull and your heart’s pull. That balance between needing to pay the bills and having a dream. It is a difficult road. All I [know is] that I [am] determined somehow to follow my heart...”
-Bear Grylls, The Kid Who Climbed Everest

Then I shared this quote with him:
"So many people live within unhappy circumstances and yet will not take the initiative to change their situation because they are conditioned to a life of security, conformity, and conservatism, all of which may appear to give one peace of mind, but in reality nothing is more dangerous to the adventurous spirit within a man than a secure future. The very basic core of a man's living spirit is his passion for adventure. The joy of life comes from our encounters with new experiences, and hence there is no greater joy than to have an endlessly changing horizon, for each day to have a new and different sun." — Chris McCandless

I don't exactly agree with the above quote (by Chris McCandless) for myself, but I get what it is trying to say. I, however, find myself in happy circumstances that include a life of security. It is having that security, both financial and familial, that allows me the freedom to plan new experiences--perhaps not as many as I would wish, but certainly more than I would have otherwise. I may not be a great explorer or an individual with a "passion" for adventure, but I do have my own little set of dreams and hopes and desires for new experiences. And I feel blessed to have a husband who loves me and encourages me to pursue those things that matter to me.

Brett and I concluded our conversation with the idea that while some dreams may come about spontaneously--for us, our dreams are most likely to happen with careful planning. Say it. Write it. See it. Plan it. Do it.

Here are some adventures we hope for:
2013- A family ski trip
(and perhaps another trip to Germany for Becca)
2014- Grand Canyon!!
2016- Taking the boys to Germany

Later that evening I asked Todd (who was not a part of the above conversation at all), "Todd, you know how Dad is having a great adventure this year....What adventure would you want to do for yourself?" His reply, "The Grand Canyon. ...and white water river rafting." I look forward to sharing our family plans with him and giving him the chance to see his dream become a reality.

I am happy that my boys have a father who can show them, teaching them by example, the way to make their dreams come true. I hope that they will be able to do the same for themselves one day.

Early Mornings

My family has been working together (unintentionally) to change my ways and become more of a morning person. I have been making an effort lately to go to be earlier (like 10:00pm early). I was forced into doing this because of the true morning people in my home, especially Brett and Todd.

It's a good system on school days. I like getting up at 6:30am and having time to get everything done without feeling crazy in the morning rush to get the kids on the bus. The only way I can feel refreshed enough to face the morning rush is if I go to by bed by 10:00 or 10:30pm.

The problem comes on the weekends (or other rebellious nights) when my night-owl tendencies keep me up doing this, that, or the other, until midnight. At least I have a balanced checkbook to show for my efforts last night, on top of a girls night out with my sister-in-law. But when 6:08am showed up I couldn't get myself back to sleep. I stayed in bed trying to force myself to sleep, with no success. I am dragging now.

Todd, on the other hand, has been enjoying a lovely morning. I am sure he was awake before 6:00am. And he was singing the National Anthem, reading Diary of a Wimpy Kid, practicing the piano, eating candy (!!), and just playing--all before 7:00am.

Brett was gone fishing who-knows-when, well before sun-up.

So, yet again, I have learned my lesson. It is impossible to sleep in, try as I might. The only way to feel good in the morning is to put myself to bed at a reasonable hour. To bed early tonight! Really!

(We'll see if I remember this lesson next weekend.)

Crying - An Unexpected First

Recently Todd shared with me that when he was watching a movie about a dog at Oma's house, it made him cry a little towards the end. Todd explained that the family in the movie moved to a new house and had to leave the dog somewhere, and the dog got out to go find the boy (or something close to that). We eventually figured out that the movie was one of the Lassie movies. I told Todd that I cry at movies all the time.

Only a day or so later I took my boys and our neighbor Logan to see Toy Story 3 at our local movie theater. There is a touching scene at the end when Andy is saying good-bye to his toys before heading off to college. My eyes started to tear up. I noticed that Todd, who was sitting right next to me, started wiping at his eyes. The scene continued. Tears were now falling down my cheek, when Todd rested his head on my shoulder. I rested my head on his. Then he linked his arm through mine on the armrest between us. We stayed like that for a few more minutes until the movie came to a close.

I can't tell you how much this experience touched me. It was such a sweet moment. Can it be that my son is maturing and developing empathy?
I certainly hope so.

Doggy Day Care

Kevin, this post is for you:

Todd and Ryan have been enjoying Magnum as he spends time at our house. It took him a couple of days at first to settle down, but Magnum now seems to feel quite comfortable and at home here. Jen has been staying busy at work, so Magnum has been spending most workdays at home with us. The boys have enjoyed having him around and will miss him when he goes back to you, his real master.

I can't really say that I will miss his shedding hair--Ryan snuggles on Magnum daily, so his shirts always carry some of Magnum with him. But Magnum has been such a sweet and patient dog to put up with all of the loving he gets from the boys. (I don't know, but he might even enjoy it.)

(Yes, that is fake poop on Magnum's back. Ah, the humor of grade-school boys--and their dads!)

Just wanted to let you know that we're doing our best to help take care of Magnum in your absence, and thought you might enjoy seeing the photos. Hope you're doing well.

Love, Becca and the boys.